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So sad...


I was driving to work this morning, singing to myself as usual, when I realized that I knew every word to "Blasphemous Rumours."

Now, I have absolutely nothing against Depeche Mode, but I began to wonder what the hell was wrong with me. In my high school years I experienced a serious case of teen angst for some reason, and my behavior included all of the following: listening to angry music such as Fugazi and Operation Ivy, dying my hair with Manic Panic into a furious shade of crimson, briefly dating a strange grim boy who wore combat boots and spoke rarely except to blurt out his love of knives (but he was a wellesley boy, so don't worry, mom and dad!), a brief foray into the fashion world of doc martens and strangely patterned tights that I would scurrilously collect at Harvard Square thrift shops, and a habit of name-dropping characters from literary masterpieces.

I tried to create a brooding dark soul of myself, and probably drove my parents crazy in the process. I even scared the Paysons, my dorm parents, once or twice with a serious crying jag or weeklong silences.

Well, at least now I know how well teenagers can act! What a drama queen-in reality I am nothing like that. Yes, the 17-year old Heather was just railing against the fact that she was bound to be yet another petite and bubbly blonde. I tried as hard as I could, but you just can't deny who you really are. Perky, yup. Exhuberant, yup. Excessively silly, and prone to foot-in-mouth moments? Oh dear god, all the time. Oh well. I said goodbye to the dark, brooding soul a long time ago, and it's only snippets of music that bring those days back. Its just funny that I had to go to such an extreme-especially when never in my life have I ever had anything to be brooding and dark about whatsoever.....

3 comments:

Jen L. said...

Now those are some pictures I'd like to see - you with crimson hair! We all go through those teen years ... mine happened in my early 20's - my hippy days!

maryse said...

is it wrong that i still wear doc martens?

several years ago i reconnected with some old highschool friends. all men. we hadn't seen eachother in 20 years.

anyway one of them remarked that in highschool i was definitely manic-depressive. i laughed and told him i was just a 16 year old girl.

blogless sharon said...

okay so are you telling me that all that manic depressiveness was like a fad as in I only wear denim with bulky sweaters or I have to have a hair cut like duran duran